As a targeted parent of Parental Alienation, I have shared in my children’s struggle in dealing with this issue. Over the past 15 years family, friends, community have listened to tales of domestic violence within our home, listened to allegations of a father’s physical and sexual abuse and neglect of his children and spouse, or stories of a “dead-beat” Dad. I am a nurturing and devoted parent. I have raised my children to embrace their intellect and to reject the ignorance of violence and, above all else, to love one another, for that is what God wants most from us.
For many years now, the children’s mother, E.D. has exploited our County's social services by making false claims of domestic violence and sexual abuse; taking time and resources away from those truly in need of these services. I’ve watched my children suffer needlessly, subjected to police visits and reports, restraining orders (reversed), countless DYFS investigations, (all found unsubstantiated), and repeated Crisis Interventions by County Mobile Response staff…all of these orchestrated by E.D. in a continuing campaign to separate me from our children. Following accusations by their mother that I held a trunk full of weapons and threatened her with guns, I decided the children needed professional help to navigate through this insanity.
Weekly therapy began and the children were taught critical thinking skills which enabled more independent thinking and self-based reality. The Court assigned a Guardian ad litem whose report found severe PA with his recommendation ED only have supervised visitation. E.D. violated several court orders which required her to return the children to my care. In fact, she encouraged them not to return by filling their heads with falsehoods, instilling a false sense of fear, and withholding her affections when they expressed any interest in their father.
It has also been discouraging to witness the lack of respect family court judges have for their own rulings. I’ve learned that there are countless cases where a non-compliant parent goes unpunished for violating court orders — a powerful and destructive message to children (and parent) about respecting law and authority. I’ve witnessed the ineffectiveness of the Court to enforce its own Orders of visitation, custody and reunification therapy.A new Somerset County NJ Judge was assigned to our case. Her ignorance, (willful or otherwise) on PAS, and on the details of our case only further contributed to the alienation. In the blink of an eye, my parenting time was suspended, and my parental rights terminated.The Judge offered no explanation, no evidence….no trial, stating only that the GAL never made the recommendations found in his June 9th 2011 letter to the Court, and the absurd suggestion that they were intended for “another case” . Without the input of any expert evaluations, and with an rather inappropriate outburst from the Judge concerning my daughter’s mental health, my role as father was taken from me.
Even though the 2002 Custody Order for 50/50 legal and residential custody with no PPR, remained, and remains in effect, I’ve not seen nor spoken with my children for two years. Like many, my children have not only lost a father, but an entire one-half of their family, completely removed from their lives, many friends and relatives shocked and devastated by the loss.
I have battled hard for my kids best interests, but realize and accept that I have little control over this situation.I continue to promote reform of our Family Court system, and PA awareness through www.publiclies.wordpress.com It is my hope that my children will one day recover from what’s been done to them, and once again be able to enjoy the love and support of their father.
Supporters are now helping to
Family Court Judges are operating outside of their judicial role when they present themselves as experts in areas other than law. Reform is needed on many levels, especially in the legal and psychological management of Parental Alienation cases. Targeted parents, especially fathers, start off at a disadvantage because the Family Division remains bias, working within the broken context of VAWA…
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