**EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW**

HEATHER SUSAN CARR

Interviewed By Meghan Chavalier

January 16, 2011

Heather Susan Carr has been very active in the LGBT/Transgendered Community as an Advocate/Activist for Civil Rights for several years. She also takes part in initiatives such as The Joyful Heart Foundation & RAINN that assist with survivors of Sexual Abuse & Violence to give them a voice. Heather has gone through the transitional process from Male to Female (MTF) . She works in Corporate America as an IT & Financial Business Analyst/Writer to analyze business models and processes for improvement for business standards. She enjoys writing from a social prospective. She also enjoys performing music as a singer and musician, playing guitar, bass, & other string instruments.

Through her journey she has learned more than she ever expected she would. She has met many people either that have gone through the same type of experiences or have had questions either about her background, or why she chose to transition, family life, to mention a few. She hopes to shed light with her experiences to show that people don’t have to go through the transition process alone. There are people that care about you, even when you may feel like you are alone and there is no one to turn to.

Heather’s Favorite Quotes:

“Heroes are people that don't realize they are Heroes, but make a difference with who they are”


“It takes only a min to meet someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone”



Where did you grow up?

I feel like I have grown up in different areas of the United States at times because I have moved a lot in my life especially for education or work. I was born in Upstate NY (near Syracuse) on June 3, 1968. I grew up in Upstate NY which was for the most part different than what most people think of New York in general because of New York City and its Mystique. Growing up in the 1970’s & 1980’s was a time of being connected but being in a way of life that we didn’t have the technology of cell phones, internet, and 500 channels of Television. I am still amazed where we are now in comparison to 20 years ago or even 10 years ago for that matter. Living in this sheltered existence and feeling you are different was unsettling at times for me. A lot of times for me growing up, I was introverted – I felt isolated and sometimes alone in my thoughts. I had issues with my weight and even had times that I bullied either by kids at school or by my older brother which didn’t help with my self-esteem at the time. In the mist of this turmoil, there were things that gave me solace – music (learning, playing & listening), dealing with my weight issues by running track – playing soccer , excelling at school – reading everything I could get my hands on for my educational advancement, and finding out who I really was as a person & making it happen.

How was your relationship with your family?

My relationship with my family was one of Dysfunction and sometimes of mutual indifference. My Father was a person that was mechanically intelligent but educationally was ignorant and never graduated high school. My mother was a person that tried to please my father and tried to play the peacemaker in the family. My older Brother and I had an uneasy relationship between the two of us. There was jealousy that I felt he had of me since I was infant, which led to fighting and sometimes even abuse by him when I was in my early teens. With the uneasiness of this situation I started to look for outlets to help me through my situation. I hid my feelings from my family because I was afraid of what would happen if they thought I was transgendered or Gay which led me into a state of denial. For the next 20 years I didn’t mention anything to my family about my feelings being transgendered and almost had to live almost a secret life between being male and wanting to Transition to being a female. For me discussing that I was transgendered wasn’t a topic for phone...